If I didn’t have a kid and had been reading our blog so far, I probably would have sent my husband out to be neutered by now. So far you have read about Biting, Sucker Punches, Picky Eaters, potty training horror stories and babysitting disasters, just to name a few. Despite all this evidence to the contrary, being a mom is not all drama and catastrophe. There are good parts too.
Let’s start at the beginning. You survived nine months of pregnancy and too many hours of labour. You have your baby in your arms, so cuddly and warm – and smelly. I mean this in a good way for once. Yes, babies in general smell nice –but that is not what I am talking about. I don’t know what it is about your own child, but there is something about the way they smell that releases the same endorphins as sex and chocolate. Just smelling them is orgasmic. Okay, maybe not the second they come out of you, but give them a bath and start smelling.
If you don’t have kids you may think I am crazy, but next time you are around a mom and baby just watch. I bet you ten bucks you will catch the mom smelling their baby’s head. It will be subtle – they won’t be sniffing like a coke addict -but if you watch closely you’ll see them nod their heads down in what appears to be a kiss on their baby’s head. It is really a sniff, I promise you. For some reason it only works with your own child though. Please don’t go around trying to smell someone else’s baby because (a) it’s kinda creepy and (b) it’s not the same anyway. I am not sure how long it lasts exactly, but I can tell you that at three years old I still love to smell Prince. Okay, that does sound kind of weird, but just trust me on this one.
Another simple pleasure for moms happens when their child is asleep. It is often said that the best kind of baby to have is a sleeping one. Not just because when they are sleeping they aren’t crying, trying to eat cat litter or shove pointy objects in the electrical outlets. There is something about watching a kid sleep that just fills you with love and makes you forget all the annoying things they do when they are awake – plus it is the best time to smell them.
At the end of a long day, you finally manage to rock your little one to sleep, and what do you do? Plop them in the crib and go have a quicky with your significant other? Nope. Even though your kid is sound asleep and you are running on less sleep then a monkey on Red Bull you choose to sit in that chair and rock (and smell) your baby just a little longer. Ok, sometimes it is because you are scared that the moment you put them down they are going to scream like they just won Oprah’s favourite things, but mostly it is because they are so adorable that it actually causes you physical pain to let them go. And when they get older it gets worse. The more mobile they become the less cuddles you get, so you have to steal them when they are sleeping. Then, when they wake up at 3am and find you in their bed, they expect you to always sleep with them. Next thing you know you are writing a blog post about how Karma bit you in the ass. But damn, those cuddles are worth it.
I am sure that at some point I am not going to be able to cuddle or smell my sons anymore without incurring some serious future therapy bills for them, but there are many other moments that make being a mom special. It starts when they say ‘mama’ for the first time – and you better hope you are not in public when that happens, because if you are you will start crying and freaking out complete strangers by yelling things like ‘Did you hear that? He said I’m his mama!’ To which people will reply ‘ok, sure thing lady’ while they are subtly dialling Child Services on their cell. And it only gets better. Soon they start saying I love you (although it sounds more like “by wube boo” ). Then they turn into little Jerry Seinfeld’s, providing the comic relief in your life by pointing out all the obvious funny crap you often miss. Like the other day at the grocery store, about five minutes after I took Prince to the potty he says “Mommy, you forgot to button my pants” and I look down to see his pants down around his ankles. I was giggling all the way to the check out.
This is by no means a comprehensive list of all the good things about being a mom. There are millions of little moments sprinkled through our days that, if we take time to look at them, will give us the strength and inspiration to be the best mom’s we can possibly be. Too often we focus on the drama in our lives and we forget to enjoy the small things. While you are still going to hear about the bad and the ugly on our blog (cause let’s face it, it’s funnier), I will try to make sure to sprinkle in some of the good stuff once in a while too. I don’t want any men getting neutered on my account.-Wendy